Jokes

put in jokes here puleese!! What do you call a squid that is holding 20 9mm pistols? Billy the squid! What card game do crocodiles play? How can two trains both go on the same train track at 8:00 and not crash? One goes at 8 in the morning, and one goes 8 at night.
 * SNAP!!**

Have a Good Laugh!!! I say waiter... ! by Lee Cheok Feng Notice: the odd numbered lines is the customer speaking, the even numbered lines is the waiter.

1) - I say waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup. - What do you expect for $1.50? A live one? 2) - I say waiter, there's a fly in my butter! - No there isn't. - I tell you there's a fly in my butter! - And I tell you there isn't: it's not a fly it's a moth, and it's not butter it's magrerine, so there! 3) - I say waiter, I'll have my bill now. -How did you find your steak sir? -Oh, I just moved the potato and there it was. 4) - I say waiter, this soup tastes funny. - So why don't you laugh? 5) - I say waiter, I can't eat this! - Why not? - You haven't given me a fork and knife. 6) - I say waiter, I'll have a pork chop. Wait, no, make that a steak. - I'm a waiter sir, not a magician! 7) - I say waiter, bring me a fried egg with finger marks on it, some greasy chips and a portion of watery cabbage soup. - We don't do food like that, sir! - You did yesterday... 8) - I say waiter, what's the meaning of this beetle in my soup? - I'm a waiter sir, not a fortune teller... 9) - I say waiter, if this is plaice then I'm an idiot. - Your're right sir, it is plaice. 10) - I say waiter, bring me tea without milk. - We haven't any milk, sir. How about tea without cream? 11) - I say waiter, this coffee tastes like soap! - Then it must be tea, sir, coffee tastes like glue. 12) - I say waiter, there's no chicken in this chicken pie. - So? You don't get dog in a dog biscuit, do you?